Everyone my age is getting married, and I'm in my room blogging.

 

Image Credit: James Devaney / WireImage

Heyyy everyone I'm back! And in a reasonable amount of time, mind you, so please take a moment to give me some snaps. But anyway, I am still working on renovating this blog. We have all the decorations; I just need to put them all together. For instance, I want to develop a more consistent posting schedule and not just pop in occasionally. But as Hillary Duff said in her comeback song "Roommate's," about how "life has been lifing" that's been happening to me lately. 

To give a brief update, I started working my little summer job, which is very brave of me. I also went to a wedding, which was very fun! Then lastly, the hardest moment of this last month was that my dear grandpa passed away, which was kind of surreal in the simplest of terms. It was very peaceful, which is a huge blessing, and I do feel somewhat at ease with it, but it's just weird. So yeah, that's how my life has been for the past month. 

Now, onto today's blog topic, which is all about dating in this day and age. Specifically, the idea of getting engaged at a young age! First, I ask you to pause your screaming and name five things you can see, four things you can feel, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, and one thing you can taste. 

Now, my last post followed kind of a similar theme about dating, and I promise you that my blog is turning into a space of just talking about boys because this is GIRL, Blogging Interrupted, not BOY, Blogging Interrupted. But what has inspired today's blog is that, honestly, every day I see a new update of someone who is my age or a year YOUNGER than me, or even TWO YEARS YOUNGER THAN ME getting engaged. 

Also, not too long ago I had an encounter at my little summer job where one customer asked me if I was married yet. And naturally, this made me a little too stunned to speak because it's like who are you talking to? But then I told her that I am only 21 and she was like oh yeah, that's way too young. Total aside, it's kind of insane that I have been confused for being a middle schooler at work, along with whether or not I'm married, like can you just pick one! 

But anyway, back on topic, lately it has felt like there has just been a flood of engagement posts as well as actual weddings coming together. Which have all made me wonder many things, like, for one, how are you doing that? Secondly, how are you affording that? And lastly, where are you finding these people? Like, please drop the tutorial, no borax, no glue, because it's like, is it just me, or did I miss something in the manual? 

In my own experience of dating, I only ever encountered men who want anything but commitment. Thus, seeing someone around my age making the choice to commit to someone else feels very foreign to me, as well as impressive. But at the same time, seeing people that I once went to high school with now getting hitched can also feel like a slap in the face a little bit. 

You want to feel happy for them, yet it can lead to a vicious cycle of comparison. Specifically, if someone my age is getting engaged already and I'm nowhere near that, then there must be something wrong with me. Furthermore, it makes you feel like you are behind, and you are running out of time. (Pause for a moment, I just noticed I have unironically been dropping bars. Like, at least three lines have had some kind of rhyme. Wait, I did it again! So consider this a little treat.) 

Looking into the perspective of those who are getting engaged, I will say I'm sure they have had to deal with a large number of people inserting their opinion on how "they are too young" and the whole "are you sure?" Which that's not fair for them to deal with, and I want to be perfectly clear that we are not here to continue that theme. Like I said, when I see these engagement posts, I'm more impressed that there are people, specifically men, wanting to commit. 

But with that, since there seems to be an increase in younger people getting engaged, it leads to the question of when is the "right" age to get engaged at if any? Because if we look into the past, during the 1950s, the common age for women to get married was 20. 

Not to use the 1950s as a landscape of what an ideal world should look like, as it was not squeaky-clean back in the day. However, the principle is that if it was normal to get married so young back then, are we doing something wrong now by not getting married right away? But also, do you really know what you want at 19, 21, or even 60? 

All these questions become even more challenging when the narrative has been constantly pushed that you need to fulfill these imaginary timelines, such as getting engaged as if you are going to expire soon, like a carton of milk. It's honestly exhausting and can be rather demoralizing that one doesn't have value unless they are getting married or having children. 

In the end, there's nothing wrong with getting engaged early, just like there is nothing wrong with living your life and prioritizing yourself and other things beyond getting engaged. 

If you do feel like you found the one at 21 and they check all the boxes, make you happy, and are ready to make that commitment, then hold onto them! Because believe it or not, there are WAY too many people out there allergic to commitment. 

And to those like me who feel more wedding blues, two things that have helped me survive feeling left out of this engagement frenzy is that for one marrying late never killed a woman, but marrying the wrong man did. We are all on our own paths, and no one is "ahead of the line" just because they have a ring on their finger. 

Secondly, while I am only dreaming about my future wedding, at least I can spend my money on myself and not have to worry about paying for a venue or some sketchy DJ. Hopefully, when the day comes, I can afford to pay for the wedding of my dreams! Or find a man who can pay for it all. 🤭🤭 (I'm only kidding unless a man wants to prove otherwise, that isn't weird.) 

That's all for now, I hope you enjoyed! And if you did like what you saw, please, please, please feel free to comment your thoughts or engage in HEALTHY conversations about this topic. Also, if you have any suggestions or topic ideas for future posts, then also please, please, please send them my way. 

Until next time!! 

XOXO,

Sam 💋💋💗💗